Tag Archives: Autism

Day Out

Autism Days Out: Cardiff International Pool

The Cardiff International Pool is located in the heart of Cardiff Bay, and along with its gym facilities, it hosts two swimming pools – a 50m pool for the serious swimmer and the leisure pool – which is where we headed for.

We have been going to the Cardiff International Pool for many years, as part of their swimming lesson program which has seen all three of my children enter the water from just a few weeks old, and well into the higher levels of component swimming. The venue’s adaptability to our needs was exemplary, allowing us to remain in the parent and toddler class with my son Rhys, who is autistic, well past the cut-off age of 3 years old. Their understanding of safety and support for our situation meant we could stay in the pool with Rhys and give him the experience he needed.

Besides the swimming lessons, Cardiff International Pool has great facilities as part of their leisure pool.

The Pool Venue

When we arrived at the pool, we parked in the free parking across from the pool, the parking is free, and there is also plenty of disabled parking if you are using your blue badge. A predestination crossing takes you across to the pool allowing for some great engagement opportunities where we get my son to push the button.

Communal change rooms

The change rooms are communal with cubicles to get changed. This is great as Rhys is getting older and I don’t know how we would be able to do split change rooms going forward. Lockers are available for your items, and we used our £1 coin to secure our bags.

The leisure pool has a large beach-type entrance to the left, which merges with the large swimming pool. This continues to the right into a lazy river and jacuzzi area. There are no inflatables available, so make sure you take your own if needed. During the times when the slides are on, there is a lot of gushing water and sprays which can be scary and noisy, we managed to avoid these by going around to the right of the pool.

It is a large area and the acoustics mean it is quite echoey and loud to the senses. It can also be very crowded and loud when busy. Rhys tends to always have his hands over his ears when entering, but he is able to overcome this due to his love for swimming and slides. It is worth noting this and if it is something your child can tolerate otherwise invest in some ear plugs if they are happy wearing them. There are currently no quiet or ALN sessions available, so it is the general public sessions that you will need to attend and contend with the standard noises and crowds.

All the slides are enclosed

To the other side of the pool are the stairs to the slides. There are four flumes. Three are standard flumes, but fast and thrilling, and end in a water trench so you do not have to be concerned about your child entering a pool at the end of the slide in cases where your child is not a strong or component swimmer. The fourth descends into a big bowl where you spin around and drop into a deep pool – this one is only for the strong swimmer and has a height minimum of 1.3m. Every flume is totally encased and not open – this was big for us, as I am petrified to send Rhys down a slide and then have him stop and stand up – massive safety risk! No worries about these ones. The stairs to the top have glass safety barriers about a meter high, which were fine for us and kept Rhys safe.

Unfortunately, there is no queue jumping, and if you are there during busy times you can wait up to ten minutes for your turn on a slide.

Cardiff International Pool Lazy river

A good tip for a quieter experience is to go on Christmas Eve or Easter Sunday. Sessions are also booked via the website and you can see how many people have booked and look for a quieter slot.

At the top of the slides, you wait your turn. With the three flumes, me and Rhys were sent through together and I was given time to get Rhys on the slide, and push him down before running and jumping down my own fume. This was great as I could go down at the same time as Rhys and not panic that someone was going to jump in front of me.

If you have a younger child (shorter than 1.2m) there is a small slide into the shallow water which is great fun.

If you are not into the thrill of the slides, the pool is extensive with shallow and deeper sections. The lazy river is also a great addition with a jacuzzi area to chill in with loads of bubbles.

Summary of Facilities

  • Three high-speed water flumes exit into a water trench/bath, so no fear of your child plunging into a pool if they can’t swim or are not strong/component swimmers.
  • One Superbowl slide for the strong component swimmer.
  • During term time fumes are only on Wednesday and Friday evenings and all day Saturday and Sunday. In holidays fumes are on every day. Check the website for details, and not differences in England and Welsh half terms.
  • If your child is under 1m they can ride with you.
  • Fumes are fully enclosed so no safety worries.
  • Multiple lifeguards on duty.
  • Carers get in free (presentation of proof is required)
  • Change rooms are communal, take £1 for the locker.
  • For quieter times go on football or rugby match days, Easter Sunday, or Christmas Eve, or check the booking site to see when it is not fully booked.

Location:

The Cardiff International pool is located at Olympian Dr, Cardiff CF11 0JS

Website: More information can be found via the Cardiff International Pool website and times to book sessions at the pool

Autism Strategy, Day Out, Uncategorized

I’m Never on the Bench – I’m Always in the Game

I always envied those parents who sat and chatted on the side at soft play centers, parks, or poolsides. They would catch up on social gossip or chill with the other parents, getting a moment to relax and be themselves.

I have never been one of those people. Well, at least since my children could walk!

When your child will leave a venue, just because they are done. Or go to the toilet at the other end of the facility, because they need to go. Never telling you their intent or agenda, I am always left with a feeling in my gut that no words can describe.

That feeling that your child is missing.

When your child doesn’t understand the concept of waiting or personal space, and cannot advocate for their challenges because words are not part of their repertoire, that’s why I am there. That’s why I am at my son’s side, to be his voice, to show him the direction, to make sure he is safe.

His autism brings challenges which I am there to help him overcome.

It means I am always active.

It means I am always involved.

It means I take part in things I may just be a bit old to enjoy, but get the thrill of childhood memories and enjoy my son’s smile at being his partner in crime.

I have crawled through soft play tunnels and got stuck in the clothes wringers when there was no other way to turn without taking my eyes off my teammate. I have sped down water slides, gripping my son with my legs as he sat in front of me on a blow-up tube. His screams of excitement as he shouts, “Hold on tight” and “Weeeeeee” – statements mimicked from me when I was trying to entice excitement and fun.

Then there are activities I have taken part in on my own. The need to understand the process, the feel, and the method, to allow me to construct a strategy to get my son involved next time or years in the future. I have scaled climbing walls and ridden bikes down steep inclines and taken on physical sports like judo, letting fully grown men throw me over their shoulders and end in their hysterics at my ear-piercing screams.

I have had my limits, but they are beyond the standard parent’s limit. I have taken part to let my son be included. Included for now and for the creation of options in the future.

I am not the parent who sits on the bench.

I am not the parent who drinks tea and talks about the latest series release, because to be honest, my television watching mostly consists of Peppa Pig and Numberblocks. I know nothing about the end of Breaking Bad or which housewife has had the biggest crisis!

But I do know that I am doing my best for my son, and to be honest, having a whale of a time doing new stuff myself.

So get up off the bench and live life. Because living brings opportunity, and opportunity creates memories you will treasure forever.

Our children can experience everything they want, sometimes they just need a little bit of support, encouragement and a teammate at their side

TOTS100 - UK Parent Blogs
TOTS100
Day Out, Popular Post

We Don’t Eat Out – Our Review of the Red Lion llandyfaelog

We don’t eat out!

But you were recommended to us, by our holiday host, as serving the best Sunday lunch around. So I guess we had to take the risk!

And you didn’t disappoint, with my son being in agreement, when he was served four sausages on a plate. No veg, no chips, no bread or butter!

Just four sausages which were consumed as he wandered around your pub. Sitting at one empty table and then locating to another. It was exactly what we had asked for. You met our requirement with no question, just a smile and as many sausages that he wanted.

I loved your barman’s smile as my son removed a bar mat from the counter. It’s coarse texture providing the perfect sensory input for his little fingers. The non verbal gesture told me you had no issue with the rearrangement of your bar accessories. You just smiled at his calmness and acceptance in your environment.

You made no comment about my boy’s constant movement around the bar area, you were happy that he was happy and comfortable, and it didn’t need words to show your acceptance, by happily letting him sneak behind the bar. There were no comments of “No kids behind here” or the face of dissatisfaction, as I have seen in other venues, you just smiled and joked about him helping out, offering him a job as long as he could manage to pour a good pint!

I am not sure he passed that interview requirement 🙂

You let me eat my Sunday dinner at the outside table, the table in the corner, at the bar from a tall bar stool, and then watched it as I had to dash after my boy before he disappeared up the stairs. My food was always waiting where I had left it, never cleared away or questioned as to its constant transportation around your restaurant.

My son was happy, he had his connection to Netflix, from your free WiFi (code displayed so I didn’t even have to ask!). This was the ultimate settler for him, the ability for him to shut out the new smells, sounds and sights while his body regulated and then allowed him to ditch the phone and investigate the new feels and places.

You didn’t even blink an eyelid at our uniqueness as a family, maybe it is because you get more trouble from the bloke down the road after a couple of Stella’s, but I didn’t know that. We did however not start any pub brawls, so I guess we made a reasonably good impression?

We don’t eat out as a family. We don’t because every trip out is a gamble. It is a risk because of how society sees my son. Of how triggers, which are a result of societies ways, can so easily result in meltdown.

Thank you for being a place of acceptance.

Oh and thanks for the larger than normal glass of wine… I think you realised I needed it.

Thanks for the hospitality Red Lion, Llandyfaelog . We will pop in again if we pass

Autism Life, Day Out

Autism: A Word to be Feared or a Fear to Not be Mentioned?

The lady said ” Would you mind me asking?”

Which was a strange question, when you don’t know what was about to be asked.

But I knew, so I nodded and said, “Of course”

I knew because my son was struggling. He was scared and anxious of the walk ahead, a place we hadn’t been in a while. A place where he didn’t have his marble run or favourite shows for comfort, just the trees and the dusty path.

He was crying, so we cuddled him to reduce his anxiety. Taking only a couple of steps and then giving a cuddle top-up, a burst of natural endorphins to keep him on the right side of the boundary of meltdown.

The lady looked at us and smiled as she warmly asked, “Is he autistic?”

“Yes he is” I answered calmly, cuddling Rhys one more time.

“You are doing an amazing job” she added.

As we walked on a few more steps and the cuddles became less and the gaps between them became further and further apart, I knew we were OK. I knew where my son’s line between anxiety and way-too-much began and ended. It had taken years of trial and error and getting to know the signs.

Rhys had just needed the cuddle-support method to get past his first hurdle.

As we walked hand in hand I thought about the lady’s question. I want more people to ask about Autism. I want it to become acceptable to ask a question if someone is thinking it and give acknowledgement of the hard. It helps sharing knowledge. It reduces the fear of the word.

I knew nothing about autism five years ago. I had heard the word but never been given any context. If the word had not been so secretive and unspoken maybe I would have gained acceptance quicker? Maybe I would have been able to understand my son’s world sooner?

Once we got past our the initial tense part of our walk, the stroll through the trees was calm and engaging. We took our time and enjoyed the outdoors. A successful trip that had unfolded as a result of a cleverly thought out plan and strategies we had learnt and others we had created ourselves.

Well until I said “Rhys, I see horses”, and then he told me to bugger off in his own special way!

I guess we are still have a bit of work on the “I see” activity goal. 😄

Autism Strategy

Autism Choices. The Way to Communication.

Choices.

At the age of two, we had our first speech and language appointment. It was pretty noneventful, but the speech therapist did give us one piece of homework to take away and implement. It was something we would use for many years and still use today. It was to encourage engagement, the first step to communication.

At the time Rhys would take us by the hand to the item he wanted. It was his ultimate way of communicating his needs. This would be the fridge for an apple, the kitchen cupboard for a rice cake, or the telly for his show. Most things were within his reach, so he would often just help himself, gaining his independence just like others his age.

But he didn’t talk. Not a sound. Not a mama or dada, or grunt or squeak. His arm-guiding method met his needs, with no requirement in his world to do anything else. The choices were going to change that, and we set about implementing them straight away.

The instructions were to put everything Rhys asked for, or currently obtained himself, out of his reach. So we moved the crackers, rice cakes and breadsticks into a top cupboard. The apples and oranges were already in the fridge fruit drawer and safely out of his grasp. We became a house with everything in the wrong place. Like when you go to your granny’s and while making a cup of tea, you struggle to find the cake knife, and eventually find it in the top cupboard wedged between the tub of flour and a hairdryer. We were now an old lady’s house with rice cakes alongside the plates and bowls, and raisons amongst the teacups.

We always had this instinctive sense of what Rhys wanted. There was only a handful of food items he ate and other activities were limited. This change was to get interaction between us and Rhys, and encourage him to ask for what he wanted rather than taking us to it.

As soon as we had rearranged the kitchen, we put the strategy into action. After being dragged to the fridge, I bent down to his eye level, fully aware of his non-verbal request for an apple. “Rhys, apple or orange” I said, gesturing each choice with each empty hand. He stood staring passed me towards the wall, no engagement, just the view in his mind that we were at the fridge, the location of his request.

I crouched there for ages that day, down at Rhys’ eye level, my calves burning, my determination strong. I was not waiting for him to perform a miracle, a verbal request for an apple, I was just waiting for a flicker of engagement. There was no magic formula, just time and hard work. It was hard that day, and every day after that. But it happened and was the start of a journey we had embarked on. That day I got a split second of eye contact, and that was all I needed to reward him with his request, an apple.

Over the years, I persevered. The response to choices increased from split seconds of eye flickers to second long moments of engagement, and slowly over time a sound was emitted that slowly formed the letter ‘a’ and later ‘apple’.

As soon as we got that first word we added more words to his request, prompting Rhys each time, and flooding him with praise as we handed over his requested item. Four years later, Rhys will now request with the words “I want orange please Mummy”, although prompting is often still required.

But life has a way of noticing when you have succeeded at a challenge, found a method that works. I walked into the kitchen, today to find my little boy now able to reach those high out of reach places from years ago. He independently opened the fridge, took out an orange, and turned to me with a smile on his face. His non-verbal communication clearly stating “I got it myself – screw you and your choices” 🙂

But I know that cheeky gesture is a form of communication we never had before. He was proud to ‘help himself’, and we needed to reach this point sometime, the time where he is growing up and wanting to do things on his own.

Our little independant boy.

🍏🍎🍊🍎🍏🍊🍎🍏

You can learn all about how to use choices from our strategies.