All posts by maggs.hay

ADHD Medication: The First 6 Weeks

Medication was never something I considered for my son. I didn’t want him doped up or a shadow of his former being. But all that is a myth with medication, and if a child (or adult) is showing these signs, then the dosage or drug is not right and needs to be checked.

Where we started

My son was diagnosed with Autism at three-and-a-half years old. We learnt all about how he saw the world and the strategies that helped to introduce routine, communicate differently and experience the world just like every other kid.

If you want to know more about autism and communication strategies and how we implemented them, click here.

As my son progressed and developed through the years, we noticed that he struggled in areas that others in his autistic peer group didn’t. Rhys never sat or remained still, ever, and even though he had developed speech, it was fast and inaudible to the general public. But what was more of a concern, was Rhys’ inability to focus, even in activities which he loved. His body and brain would not let him, meaning he struggled to move on with school or experience activities that were available to him.

These traits lead us to journey down the path to obtaining an ADHD diagnosis, and because we already were experts in communication and strategies surrounding routine, the only other option to consider, in the package of support, was medication.

ADHD unlike autism can be improved via medication, and a route we were keen to explore. If it wasn’t right for my son we would stop, but we needed to try to see if it would help him learn and progress through school.

Taking the Medication

Rhys was prescribed Methylphenidate 10mg, a stimulant drug that would increase activity in his brain and therefore increase concentration. It came in capsule form allowing us to break open the pill and sprinkle it onto his jammy toast each morning.

This was key for us, as there was no option to get Rhys to swallow a pill. Other medication had brought its own challenges in liquid form, and had been a reason an ADHD diagnosis had not been considered before, because how would Rhys take any meds?

Rhys was to have the 10g sprinkled capsule at breakfast, which would have an effect within 45 minutes. The drug would last for a period of eight hours before wearing off and returning Rhys to his previous state.

Although Methylphenidate is an instant-release drug with changes presenting themselves within the hour, we had started with a low dose, as the body does take time to adapt, so this was never going to be an instant miraculous change.

Side Effects

No medication comes without side effects, and we had not been exempt from that challenge. Any medication takes time to embed and for the body to accept, that’s why the first six weeks are a challenge.

Rhys suffered a sore tummy and headaches that left him with his head in his hands and us rubbing his tummy for comfort. We combated the pain with Capol which eased the pain and discomfort, but it also lead us to question whether having the medication every day was the right choice, leading to a few medication holidays where the days off helped his body cope with the change.

Methylphenidate, or any other stimulant, has the effect of being an appetite suppressant. Rhys would eat his breakfast and then return home from school with a full lunchbox, untouched. This wasn’t a worry, the actual challenge was how quickly I could cook an extra large pizza and have it ready from when he walked through the door, as hunger would set in quickly as the medication eased its hold.

The side effects were tough and I didn’t know if it was worth it to carry on. The paediatrician had said if there was any reason we were uncomfortable with the medication we could just stop.

The Management of Transition

Most research around ADHD, and the management of the condition, has been done with individuals who have a single diagnosis of ADHD, and not multiple diagnoses’ like my son. The combination of ADHD, Autism, SPD and Anxiety means a complex reaction to medication that is often a game of Russian roulette, not knowing what you are going to face.

One of the most challenging areas to manage was the transition as the drugs started to wear off and the feeling Rhys would feel. Any transition in the autism world is challenging, even simple ones like moving from sleep to an awake state, not to mention the move between daily activities, so a drug-related transition was something that had to be understood.

It brought hunger, distress and inevitably meltdowns. We managed it with large pizzas, a relaxed environment, his favourite television shows and all of his favourite things.

This side effect was the hardest of all to manage.

The Six Week Mark

After sore tummies and achy heads being eased by Calpol, the side effects, including the challenging afternoon transitions, all started to ease. Rhys’ body adapted to the change, and we came to a state where it was part of the everyday breakfast routine.

He was still on a low dose, but we did notice a sharper focus, an improved ability to wait in line, and a slight improvement in speech.

He is only on 10mg, a very low dose, but it made sense why we had to start in this way. The effects of a drug like Methylphenidate are largely impacting, and not something to rush into.

We now will discuss with the paediatrician our next steps, which will be an increase in dosage, and possibly another few weeks of regulation. But the positive is that the side effects were short-term, even if they did feel lengthy at the time. Rhys’ improvements were there, and we still have the same objective in mind, how we can help him focus.

Follow our journey across all social media platforms, find out more here.

The BAPS Blog Awards: A Night to Remember

The BAPs (Bloody Awesome Parents) Blog Awards are an event put on by My Family My Needs every year, recognising SEN (Special Educational Needs) Bloggers across the UK. It is an amazing event that I never thought I would have the pleasure of attending, let alone walking away with an award!

How I Got There

It started back in the Summer when an email dropped into my inbox., the subject, “Congrats you are a finalist”, and my heart beat a thousand beats in astonishment. There were a number of categories within the awards, and I had been nominated for “Blog Post with the Biggest Impact” – Wow!

Read the nominated post below:

Out of all the thousands of bloggers, to actually have a post out of the millions of blog posts in circulation to be recognised, was just huge. But the strange thing was that if I had to choose the post I thought had the biggest impact, the one nominated, would not be that one. It highlighted to me that every post I wrote resonated with someone, and this post had impacted someone massively.

A Bump in the Road

The Blog Awards were scheduled for October, a Thursday night, and I pulled out all the stops to make sure I could be there in person. I was not a person who got nominated for these sorts of things. I am an IT architect, doing logical technical designs, not someone who was up there with the best in parenting or psychology subjects – but here I was on a list of finalists for something that was so close to my heart.

But things don’t always go to plan, and due to national rail strikes and another hit of the dreaded covid, the awards had to be postponed.

The Night Arrived

The 2022 awards were hosted in the amazing Athena in Leicester. The building is amazing, with big doors entering into a foyer. As we walked into the second set of doors, the place was lit up and I was overcome with nostalgia. The bar was to the left of us, and down a few steps was a hustle and bustle of over a hundred people, all seated at round tables laid with dinner wear, wine, and treats. Four massive letters were illuminated on the stage – B A P S.

I held my husband’s arm with nerves as we made it to table number 5, our seats for the night, or at least for the next few hours. I didn’t know anyone, except that I was aware of some other blogs I followed being there too. Little did I know, that I would leave having met some truly inspiring people, some who shared their journies through their blogs, and others who had impacted our communities through amazing actions of their own.

The Winners Announced

It did not take long before Cerrie Burnell took to the stage and gave us all an introduction to the awards, then it was straight in, with my category up first. I don’t think my heart has beat so hard and fast ever in its life. I was up against three other amazing bloggers, and reading their stories made me believe that I did not have a chance in this, their words and pictures of their journeys were inspiring.

But here I was.

As the words were read, I realised that they sounded familiar, but still, I couldn’t bring myself to think they could be speaking about me. The words were being spoken to over a hundred people, and they were all listening. Then it was confirmed, “The winner is A&Me”

I stood and walked to the stage, and all I could think was “Do not fall over”. You think of strange things in times of stress and anxiety, and these were my only thoughts, not to make a tit of myself!

When you type and share your story with thousands, it is done behind a screen, and your words are sent out into the social networking world, comments and likes come back, but standing on the stage, holding an award made me realise that there are real people on the other side of the screen. There are people reading my stories, and my posts so make an impact.

As I returned to my seat, I just looked at the award in my hand. I had won a blog award, something I never thought was possible. I knew that my posts were helping others and I was so grateful to be recognised for them.

The BAPS blog awards recognise SEN bloggers and contributors to raising awareness of disability every year. Details can be found on the My Family Our Needs site.

Autism Days Out: Cardiff International Pool

The Cardiff International Pool is located in the heart of Cardiff Bay, and along with its gym facilities, it hosts two swimming pools – a 50m pool for the serious swimmer and the leisure pool – which is where we headed for.

We have been going to the Cardiff International Pool for many years, as part of their swimming lesson program which has seen all three of my children enter the water from just a few weeks old, and well into the higher levels of component swimming. The venue’s adaptability to our needs was exemplary, allowing us to remain in the parent and toddler class with my son Rhys, who is autistic, well past the cut-off age of 3 years old. Their understanding of safety and support for our situation meant we could stay in the pool with Rhys and give him the experience he needed.

Besides the swimming lessons, Cardiff International Pool has great facilities as part of their leisure pool.

The Pool Venue

When we arrived at the pool, we parked in the free parking across from the pool, the parking is free, and there is also plenty of disabled parking if you are using your blue badge. A predestination crossing takes you across to the pool allowing for some great engagement opportunities where we get my son to push the button.

Communal change rooms

The change rooms are communal with cubicles to get changed. This is great as Rhys is getting older and I don’t know how we would be able to do split change rooms going forward. Lockers are available for your items, and we used our £1 coin to secure our bags.

The leisure pool has a large beach-type entrance to the left, which merges with the large swimming pool. This continues to the right into a lazy river and jacuzzi area. There are no inflatables available, so make sure you take your own if needed. During the times when the slides are on, there is a lot of gushing water and sprays which can be scary and noisy, we managed to avoid these by going around to the right of the pool.

It is a large area and the acoustics mean it is quite echoey and loud to the senses. It can also be very crowded and loud when busy. Rhys tends to always have his hands over his ears when entering, but he is able to overcome this due to his love for swimming and slides. It is worth noting this and if it is something your child can tolerate otherwise invest in some ear plugs if they are happy wearing them. There are currently no quiet or ALN sessions available, so it is the general public sessions that you will need to attend and contend with the standard noises and crowds.

All the slides are enclosed

To the other side of the pool are the stairs to the slides. There are four flumes. Three are standard flumes, but fast and thrilling, and end in a water trench so you do not have to be concerned about your child entering a pool at the end of the slide in cases where your child is not a strong or component swimmer. The fourth descends into a big bowl where you spin around and drop into a deep pool – this one is only for the strong swimmer and has a height minimum of 1.3m. Every flume is totally encased and not open – this was big for us, as I am petrified to send Rhys down a slide and then have him stop and stand up – massive safety risk! No worries about these ones. The stairs to the top have glass safety barriers about a meter high, which were fine for us and kept Rhys safe.

Unfortunately, there is no queue jumping, and if you are there during busy times you can wait up to ten minutes for your turn on a slide.

Cardiff International Pool Lazy river

A good tip for a quieter experience is to go on Christmas Eve or Easter Sunday. Sessions are also booked via the website and you can see how many people have booked and look for a quieter slot.

At the top of the slides, you wait your turn. With the three flumes, me and Rhys were sent through together and I was given time to get Rhys on the slide, and push him down before running and jumping down my own fume. This was great as I could go down at the same time as Rhys and not panic that someone was going to jump in front of me.

If you have a younger child (shorter than 1.2m) there is a small slide into the shallow water which is great fun.

If you are not into the thrill of the slides, the pool is extensive with shallow and deeper sections. The lazy river is also a great addition with a jacuzzi area to chill in with loads of bubbles.

Summary of Facilities

  • Three high-speed water flumes exit into a water trench/bath, so no fear of your child plunging into a pool if they can’t swim or are not strong/component swimmers.
  • One Superbowl slide for the strong component swimmer.
  • During term time fumes are only on Wednesday and Friday evenings and all day Saturday and Sunday. In holidays fumes are on every day. Check the website for details, and not differences in England and Welsh half terms.
  • If your child is under 1m they can ride with you.
  • Fumes are fully enclosed so no safety worries.
  • Multiple lifeguards on duty.
  • Carers get in free (presentation of proof is required)
  • Change rooms are communal, take £1 for the locker.
  • For quieter times go on football or rugby match days, Easter Sunday, or Christmas Eve, or check the booking site to see when it is not fully booked.

Location:

The Cardiff International pool is located at Olympian Dr, Cardiff CF11 0JS

Website: More information can be found via the Cardiff International Pool website and times to book sessions at the pool

I’m Never on the Bench – I’m Always in the Game

I always envied those parents who sat and chatted on the side at soft play centers, parks, or poolsides. They would catch up on social gossip or chill with the other parents, getting a moment to relax and be themselves.

I have never been one of those people. Well, at least since my children could walk!

When your child will leave a venue, just because they are done. Or go to the toilet at the other end of the facility, because they need to go. Never telling you their intent or agenda, I am always left with a feeling in my gut that no words can describe.

That feeling that your child is missing.

When your child doesn’t understand the concept of waiting or personal space, and cannot advocate for their challenges because words are not part of their repertoire, that’s why I am there. That’s why I am at my son’s side, to be his voice, to show him the direction, to make sure he is safe.

His autism brings challenges which I am there to help him overcome.

It means I am always active.

It means I am always involved.

It means I take part in things I may just be a bit old to enjoy, but get the thrill of childhood memories and enjoy my son’s smile at being his partner in crime.

I have crawled through soft play tunnels and got stuck in the clothes wringers when there was no other way to turn without taking my eyes off my teammate. I have sped down water slides, gripping my son with my legs as he sat in front of me on a blow-up tube. His screams of excitement as he shouts, “Hold on tight” and “Weeeeeee” – statements mimicked from me when I was trying to entice excitement and fun.

Then there are activities I have taken part in on my own. The need to understand the process, the feel, and the method, to allow me to construct a strategy to get my son involved next time or years in the future. I have scaled climbing walls and ridden bikes down steep inclines and taken on physical sports like judo, letting fully grown men throw me over their shoulders and end in their hysterics at my ear-piercing screams.

I have had my limits, but they are beyond the standard parent’s limit. I have taken part to let my son be included. Included for now and for the creation of options in the future.

I am not the parent who sits on the bench.

I am not the parent who drinks tea and talks about the latest series release, because to be honest, my television watching mostly consists of Peppa Pig and Numberblocks. I know nothing about the end of Breaking Bad or which housewife has had the biggest crisis!

But I do know that I am doing my best for my son, and to be honest, having a whale of a time doing new stuff myself.

So get up off the bench and live life. Because living brings opportunity, and opportunity creates memories you will treasure forever.

Our children can experience everything they want, sometimes they just need a little bit of support, encouragement and a teammate at their side

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Teaching Judo where Inclusivity is about Adaption

I had four children in front of me. Three boys and a little girl. All were roughly the same in age, around five and six years old?

As I stood in front of them, I hoped that my judo knowledge would be sufficient or at least enough to con a group of young children.

I was nervous but didn’t want to show it.

“Who wants to learn a judo throw?” I shouted with enthusiasm.

The little girl shouted “yes!” with excitement, and the boy next to her joined in, but the other two sat in silence. Not a sound was muttered.

There are many reasons a child will not talk. It can be from speech delays, autism, anxiety or even selective mutism. The way we see the world and develop is different for every one of us.

And from my experience I knew this.

I knew that in this setting I was not going to get a verbal confirmation of the desire to learn, and as I demonstrated the throw, I immediately knew that a different method of teaching was needed.

Instructing with words and then looking for a verbal recognition was not a result I could bank on.

So I paused.

I knelt down to the level of my audience, and I held up my hand.

“Who’s in?” I shouted, and waited for the non verbal response. My more confident students jumped up and slapped out the strongest five fives they could muster, while the two, who were a bit quieter, watched.

I crawled forward and held up my hand. I smiled at the boy in front of me and he smiled back, lifting his hand and tapping out his response. The fourth then followed with his agreement in being part of the group, his high five a bit more reluctant, but his message was clear, he was ready.

I then paired them up. I took each by hand and put them in position. I placed my hand on the mat to show where to stand, and even nudged their feet in the right directions – another form of non verbal communication.

When all four children started to tire and their attention spans drifted, I announced “Last one in line gets thrown by me!” in the hope that they would fear it and line up immediately.

But the opposite happened.

They all wanted to be thrown.

Their cheeky smiles were across their faces. Their bums wiggling in anticipation.

So the lesson changed once again. It adapted to meet the desires of the group.

After half an hour I gave the last set of high fives and saw a change in four young children.

Not one of their throws were perfect. But each one of their smiles was present.

And that’s all I needed to make my day.

Get to know your students. Get to know those around you. Every one is different. Everyone has a different ability. But everyone can learn. It is just up to us to adapt our methods to make it possible.

That’s inclusivity.